June 26, 2011

Fundraising and the importance of family

It was my dad's birthday yesterday and he was out of town for business.  I feel bad that I didn't get to celebrate with him!  But, it reminded me that I wanted to blog about recent developments with fundraising...

Just before, and right after my grandmother died, I was talking on the phone with my mom and she said something that I won't ever forget.

 She talked about how well she thought that my grandmother was cared for in our home.

She said that my dad had commented to her at my grandmothers death bed that she looked clean and well taken care of.....

For any of you who have done elderly care, you will likely understand why this was so important to me.

It is a job that is very emotionally taxing, often takes you way out of your comfort zone, and is very hidden.

I use the word "hidden" because elderly care is not a popular topic to bring up over a nice lunch with friends.  It is not polite conversation to bring up which adult diaper seems to absorb the best.  (We liked Tena! LOL!)

And, even family may become uncomfortable with discussing this topic because it brings up the inevitable feelings of....."what will happen to me when I become frail and elderly...."

It is not a light and jaunty conversation.

My children and I did learn to make light of some of the arduous and emotionally challenging tasks.  There were several incidents of laughter over diaper changes that resulted in desitin getting in my hair!  Don't ask!!!

My mother went on to say that she didn't think that my grandmother would have done so well if we hadn't been there to take care of her.  Hearing her say those words truly helped me cope much better through my grandmother's death. 

My dad is an electrical engineer.  And, I think he is a great one...but I would never know because when he talks about his work...no one understands anything about what he is saying! 

The reason why I explain this is that he is very logical and analytical.  He certainly has gotten sappier in his older days (sorry dad! :-)  But, overall he likes to make good and solid logical decisions and statements.

Not long after my grandmother died, my dad said that he had thought that my grandmother would be in the nursing home for hospice care for at least a month.  And, he would have the large bill that would accompany it.  But, because we had kept my grandmother with us and she passed away only one day into her nursing home stay.....

My dad offered to donate to our adoption fundraiser, the money that would have gone to pay for the nursing home.....

It meant and still means so much to me because I know that he has been a bit baffled by the idea of us adopting internationally.  And, I will admit that it is, at least at face value, not a logical decision.

So, the next step of our adoption has been covered and we can proceed as soon as our homestudy is done with the USCIS process and hopefully covering the fees up to submitting the dossier. 

I am so thankful to my parents and I want them to know that I prayed this very morning with a very repentant heart of how I've been as a daughter and how I plan to work harder.

I dedicate this post to both of you...mom and dad....for taking care of and raising me, for loving my children, for coming to important church functions like Amelia's baptism even though you are not members of the church, and for your help to make this adoption possible!
We all love and thank you so much!!!!


  1. Cynthia,

    I ran across your blog today and wrote about it on my blog. I hope my post helps with you in the adoption process. I try and encourage others to give to worthy causes.

    LDS Philanthropies

  2. Thank you so much! I am so grateful and appreciate your efforts to help so many worthy causes. It is quite admirable!


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